As I lay in my bed with my laptop trying to get some work done, sick little Colby is napping beside me. (He snores just like Scott, and it's not because he's sick, he's always been a loud, noisy sleeper and breather since the day he was born.) I realize that I may be a step closer to getting this whole "mom" thing down. I can't recall how many times I have been called in the middle of the work day to pick up a sick kid, usually for a fever, too many to count but amazingly not as many as you would imagine having a kid (Chase) with a seriously low immune system. And, I must admit, I'm really glad it's not Chase who is sick but I imagine it's only a matter of time. The whole family will probably be sick in a few days, ugh.
Anyway, I'm proud of myself today. I did not immediately hang up the phone, pick Colby up and drive him straight to the doctor without an appointment and have them fit us in. I decided to evaluate little Colby first. I've done this before where I take him in and our doctor looks at me like I do not have a clue and am way to nervous, anxious, and frazzled over a minor cough or cold and should probably not have brought him in but I did and they end up sending me home after my $25 co-pay telling me to "watch and see" how he does over the next 2-4 hours.
Colby has a little stomach bug, he drank a little bit and threw up a few times after we got home but was quite perky after and drank more. We sat together for a bit, he was clingy and not totally happy but not overly fussy either. He started to get sleepy and is now napping beside me totally content and doing fairly well, no fever. I do have a call in to our doctor to touch base but I have not scheduled an appointment yet.
So, I guess this little post is to celebrate just a little bit that I'm not such a nervous nelly anymore, I've come a long way and am learning to trust my motherly instincts rather than thinking the sky is falling every time Chase or Colby get sick...(knock on wood). It is hard to see them not feeling well but going to the doctor isn't always the solution... and freaking out most certainly isn't either. Staying calm is key, this is true especially when Chase is sick. He's old enough now that he understands when I'm stressed or scared and that just makes him more so. Kids rely on you to be strong and not freak out especially when they are sick and they need their mommy and daddy. No pressure there especially when your mind goes to all those dark "what if" places... But I guess that is what we signed up for when we became parent's, right? Easier said then done on so many levels. I've got a long journey ahead of me but it's comforting to know that I'm taking steps in the right direction...
I haven't clue why this is but when I run all is right with the world. Running inspires me, motivates me, gets my adrenaline going and helps me put it all into perspective as much as is possible anyway... It is my time to think, to reconnect, to de-stress, to contemplate, to reflect, to hope, to problem-solve, to push, to smile, to feel and be young, to understand, to challenge, to pray, and to Let...It...ALL..Go!
Whatever it is for you... Do IT! Do what you love, do what makes you happy, do what makes you a better you and helps you forget the small things that don't matter... (Thanks Scotty, for giving me this much needed time on the treadmill this morning! I <3 you!)
Today's Playlist:
Photograph - Nickelback
Good Riddance - Green Day
Suddenly I See - KT Tunstall
Can't Change Me - Chris Cornell
In or Out - Ani DeFranco
Blue Skies - Tori Amos
What comes around goes around - Justin Timberlake
This is us - Emmylou Harris and Mark Knoffler
What you are - Dave Matthews Band
Float On - Modest Mouse
Spotlight - Mutemath
Supermassive Blackhole - Muse
So Right - Dave Matthews Band
Start me up - Rolling Stones
Don't Phunk with my heart - Black-eyed Peas
